impure_tale

Entry tags:

pensive,
stildyne

194

Although I know the answer, it serves a person well to consider what it is that drives a crowd of people -- even those who profess themselves relatively good, or even religious -- to relish the notion of hanging, shooting, or beheading a person in full public view.

[Private to Stildyne]

Dearheart, if you are not otherwise indisposed I would relish some proper company.

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Not during the breach.

No.

[It's agreement, resigned. Stildyne's hand moves up, fingertips running through his hair, along the crown of the skull.]

[The Marquis tilts his head into the touch, sighing.]

I'm beginning to think that man and his situation resembled my position in this place far too closely.

Feeling the need to put out to sea? [It's a cautious question. He's not sure he wants to know the answer.]

Wondering if I am merely haunting this place.

[A nod.]

Having done your piece-- come to redemption, led someone else there as well-- wondering what the point is?

No, I am quite aware of what the point is.

But you don't feel-- useful?

Or is it more?

[He needs to understand as much as he thinks he likely doesn't want to.]

It is partly that.

[A sigh]

...I wish that I knew what happened to Lucius Malfoy. His wife and son needed him, and I should hate to think he simply went back to being dead.

I know how badly you regret his leaving. Can you look in on him, like you did on Pavi? Does the Admiral's meddling go that far?

He departed without graduating. I doubt it is that simple.

I was afraid that'd be the case. [He keeps up his soothing caress.]

Will it help, when you're reassigned? Do you think? He's got to give you someone, known productive as you are.

I am hoping. [A little smile.] Perhaps with an Inmate I will feel a good deal less melancholy.

[Stildyne leans his head against the Marquis' shoulder.]

I'm hoping for it, too. Of course, I want you to have every incentive to stay a while.

I know it's not the use you'd prefer to be, but you've kept me level more times than one, Donatien.

[He reaches up to stroke Stildyne's temple, a half-amused smile]

Have I, Brachi?

There've been a few nasty memories that I needed drawing back from myself.

I didn't realize how good it was to be out of Secured Medical until I was put back in. As far as my memory went. You helped me back out of being Chief Warrant Officer, JFS Whichever-ship-I-was-minding-the-torturer-on. You didn't realize?

You cannot credit me for holding you back, Brachi. You did that yourself.

I'd have managed in time, but-- it was as good as having the metal grating under my feet again, the way I felt. Easy enough to fall back into being an inquisitor's helper and focus on the man who'd done the cutting and not the poor soul who'd been brutalized, because it was just so damned ugly. Think of the cleanup and not what'd happened to necessitate it.

I dreamt of being back there. But you're one of the best reminders that I'm not. And you've taken care of me during all the little pitfalls. You've spoiled me. I don't regret a bit of it.

[He smiles.] It was nothing, dearheart.

You're also the only man who's ever used a nickname on me-- bar Stoshi, who's hi me with 'darling' in the right mood--and I still enjoy it thoroughly.

I hope so, as I don't intend to stop.

[He hides a grin against the Marquis' neck.]

I only wish I could return the favor with any skill.

Want a game of cards tonight? Or to share your latest?

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194

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