impure_tale | 173 [Warden Filter]

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173 [Warden Filter]

I need a volunteer. Given recent events and the reason for which my Inmate is interred in level Zero, I am finding myself in need of time to recover and meditate. An interim Warden will be required. While Iago remains below levels for the next week, your services will not be needed. For two to three weeks following, however, they will be. If I find that I am unable to come to some...middle ground regarding what has occurred, then I will request that the Admiral find a permanent replacement.

If nothing else, I require a mediator, and perhaps some sound advice.

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I know he did not act with the intent to slight me. It is simply how it feels. I simply thought I knew him better than this, but if he is still of a mind that he'll kill on a whim and for no other reason, then I have to doubt every progress he has made.

Are you absolutely sure that's the only reason he was acting, though? I know sometimes my inmate has told me she's done some awful things because she was bored. There's usually something much more underlying than just killing on a whim - and that might really prove you have got somewhere.

Because, in the end, you have to hope and look for the best in him; and the fact you expect better doesn't mean, necessarily, that he's betrayed you. It means that there's been something there where he has proven himself to be a better man. If you continually expect the worst - that's all he'll show you.

Things go wrong, we can all get our perceptions wrong, and take them wrong. It doesn't mean everything good you've seen in him - you must have seen in him to think he wouldn't do this - is invalid or worthless or even wrong.

If that makes any sense.

It is the only reason he will disclose. Immediately after the incident he had little enough thought for it that he was laughing about it -- in my presence and to his friends over the network.

What would you have me do? What would you have me think?

That doesn't mean it's the only one he has. I hope it isn't, but I can't tell from over here.

I can't answer that for you.

But I wouldn't have you give up on him - I don't mean that an insulting sense, as it might seem quite rational to let it go. Because as much as, aye, he probably needs to see how awful and devastating and truly wrong it is. but in the end, you're the one who has to go back and say to him 'I've seen better in you than this, I know that you can do better and here's why'. I would have you seriously look at everything he's done here - good and bad - and find the reasons he should be redeemed, find the parts which have made you think he wasn't the sort of man who killed for fun any more.

Because it's always easy to find the horrific, the nasty, the immoral things our inmates do. At those times, it's alright for everyone else to dwell in that, to hate him, whatever, but you're the one who has to find forgiveness, find the decent part of him and believe in him. Part of that is finding out or trying to understand why this really happened, but also in having some faith in the better aspects of his time here, and believing they're something worth holding on to.

It removes much of the consequence in what they do, if they value their keeper at all.

Which might be a fair point if he'd actually done this to spite you. The consequences of what he's done should have less to do with you and more to do with the people he's hurt. And yes, part of that is letting him know he's let you down.

But giving up on him is basically saying there's no way back from this. Which might just lead him to end up thinking he might as well do whatever the hell he wants now. Part of him being here, surely, is to realise that you can find a way back from where you are.

You've given me much to think about, Sergeant. Merci.

I hope it's helped. If there's anything else, you know where I am.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

173 [Warden Filter]

private

Re: private

private

Re: private

private

Re: private

private - much later

Re: private - much later